Parting is such sweet sorrow...

I hate goodbyes.
HATE them.
And I don't mean the "Goodbye, 'cuz you're leaving the theatre and I won't see you 'til Tuesday" kind of goodbye. I mean when out-of-town actors return home or graduated students leave for college or friends and colleagues relocate permanently.

I will hide.
I will ditch.
I will send flowers and cards.
I'll text or Facebook.
I'll write a song and make a personal video.
But I loathe in-person goodbyes.
I get too attached to people too quickly and it becomes overwhelming. I either cry and babble and carry on like someone is dying a slow and painful death - or I shut down completely and then go home to bawl in the shower or eat my feelings in shameful solitude.

Opening Night Party = Awesome!
Closing Night Party = Torture!

It's 3am on Saturday morning and I can't sleep because my very own farewell party is tonight.

I have been purposely immersing myself in the logistics of moving - the paperwork for the new apartment, getting utilities scheduled, repairs on the Jeep, packing, donating, tossing, selling and packing some more... Anything and everything I can to live in blissful ignorance for just one more day.
But the truth is, I'm going to have to say goodbye.
Not for good. Hell, I'll be back in six weeks to do a show at ABT and will be here through Thanksgiving, so there's that.

But there's after that... and then after that, too...

And finally, in the solace of an empty bedroom - I give in to my denial.
I bitch and moan and gripe about my home state constantly. If you've known me long enough, you've heard me gripe about the weather, the politics, the landscape, the economy, the idiots... or all of the above.
But the truth is, there's a reason that I've lived here for all of my 36 years. There are many reasons.

Even if the weather was unbearable, the politics ridiculous and the economy in the toilet, the people... MY people made it worth living here. My family. My neighborhoods. My theatre community. The people I grew up watching... the people I grew up with...

YOU... reading this right now... are one of the reasons it is so hard for me to leave.

There are too many people to list in a blog post, and I suspect it would get boring... but I'm going to do some shout-outs via Facebook and perhaps an individual blog or two to help me get all the sappy out of my system.
Truth is, I hate goodbyes... and tonight I'll have no choice but to face them. Many of them.
Thank HEAVENS I'll be doing it mostly drunk! :)

It's bittersweet, but I'm at least excited for the chance to have so many of my friends in one place at one time. Plus it has been a good while since anyone threw a party for me.

Hmmm... maybe I should move more often.  In fact, maybe I should have a 'Farewell Pary - Part 2' when I close the ABT show!

Regardless, I'm ultimately grateful to have people in my life worth saying goodbye to - even if it does mean doing the ugly cry in front of them all.