Finding and creating work...

I wrote a play once.

Scratch that... I wrote a full-length historical play about the women's suffrage movement (minus one scene of dialogue that was never really to my liking), a one-act black comedy about intervention, two outlines for a dysfunctional family comedy (that I wrote while I was high on drugs from my oral surgery), and half of a two-woman/one man cabaret.

While a few close friends have heard about (and some have even read parts of) the former, none of my latter works have been seen by human eyes.

I had originally hoped to workshop and premiere 'Ain't I a Woman' (which is still a working title) this spring, but negotiations fell apart and I ended up booking so much acting work that I had little time to write, edit, refine, etc. Furthermore, the local actresses that I would call upon for casting have been quite busy themselves, so the project was put on hold indefinitely.

I'm two weeks from going to Arkansas for a show, where I'll be a bit more isolated than I am now - a perfect opportunity (with fewer distractions) to write during my free time. I'm almost giddy at the prospect!

Over the next two weeks, I'll be packing and prepping, learning lines and music, and finishing production of the show I'm currently running. Then it's two months in Little Rock followed by two more weeks of packing to move out of my rental house by the second week of June. It's both frantic and static - which is difficult for me to deal with. I have no plan for post-June. The work I have for next season doesn't start until after the holidays - which means I have six months of work to book. Stat.

I proudly cling to the fact that I live in poverty in exchange for working in an industry that I have great passion for. But being an actor means I'm basically professionally unemployed. I've never collected unemployment from the government in my life - though I did have AHCCCS (government insurance) when I was pregnant with my son. I'd like to keep it that way... but I find that my home state is no longer as fruitful in the arts as it once was. There's just not enough sustainable work year-round and so I've had to travel more and more with each year to find enough work to pay my bills.

And thus my decision was made... to transition out of the desert and to some place more artist-friendly. I've been to NYC twice in the last 6 months for auditions, but I don't feel comfortable living there because it's SO freakin' expensive!! Unfortunately, Chicago isn't much better.
And so it begins that in the next three months, I will be finishing my plays so they can be submitted for workshop. I will be crashing every general audition and cattle call that I can get my happy ass into. I will be canvassing agencies and littering their offices and email inboxes with headshots and resumes. And I will continue pricing and scouting real estate in Florida, New England, and the Pacific Northwest.

Down to a wing and a prayer, I embark on this journey that will be 'Next to Normal'... holding my breath and keeping my fingers crossed the whole way. I will find good work and I will create good work. This is my goal.

I guess I'm hoping this will serve as a heads-up that I intend to be a bit of a recluse for the next two months. Little Rock is a beautiful city that I find artistically inspiring, so I will use that to my advantage as I finish writing... if nothing else, because I want to be able to claim more than just "I wrote a play once".

Why, Monday? WHY?

So today is my one day off this week.
Well, Monday is typically my one day off every week.

Today, however, I decided I wasn't going to take it for granted. I woke up in a decent enough mood and was being really sweet to Monday. "How about you play some video games?" "You want Chinese takeout and a foot massage later, baby?" You know... giving Monday the full 'Watson' treatment for a good time... but to no avail. Monday shat on me yet again.

You see... Monday is an imposter.

For the rest of the world, Monday is negative. It's the beginning of a long work week, the start to the unbearable week of school. There are cliches that make 'Monday' and 'depression' synonymous. While Friday gets accolades and even a chain of mediocre restaurants.

This is becoming a problem for my reality.

I want to love my Monday. I want to revel in its sloth. When I open the door at 3pm in my pajamas with a glass of wine in hand and remote control in the other and proclaim, "Hey, it's Monday!", I want my neighbors to understand. (Rather than whisper "intervention" under their breath.)

But because the majority of humans consider Monday to be 'all business', I feel like I'm forced to participate in the same vein. I take the call from the bank. I agree to meet my landlady. I get out of my fracking pajamas before 9am and run errands. I catch up on laundry and dishes and menial housework. I wait until after 5pm to pour my glass of wine.

Monday has fooled me into thinking I have a day off, but manipulates me into working just the same.

I have a plan, however. I'm three weeks away from going to Little Rock for 'Next to Normal'. And I vow - with all that is in me - that on at least ONE of those Mondays, I'm going to stay holed up in my apartment in my pajamas with a bottle of wine and my Netflix. I will stand proudly in my antisocial den of sloth and reclaim my Monday. I will reignite our love affair and prove to her that the masses are wrong about Friday and that she - Monday - is and always will be the best day of the week.

Oh yes, Monday. I haven't given up on you yet, you wily succubus. I will strip away your business disguise and expose you for the beauty that you truly are.

One of these weeks...

AZ & Birth Control -or- Debbie Lesko is an Idiot

After the Keating scandal in the 80's, the SB1070 controversy and the debacle that is Jan Brewer, I didn't think it was possible to be more disillusioned by my home state.

Boy, was I wrong!

Yesterday, a Senate Judiciary Committee endorsed Republican Debbie Lesko's HB2625 by a vote of 6-2, which would allow an employer to request proof that a woman using insurance to buy birth control was being prescribed the birth control for reasons other than not wanting to get pregnant.

Nevermind the fact that I want to grab Debbie Lesko and shake her violently by the ovaries. I feel betrayed as a woman and as a 'minority'. Yes, Arizona views women as minorities. But that's another rant for another day.

So, here's my current rant about this preposterousness.

First, there's this little thing called HIPAA (Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act) that came about in the 90's to protect people from having their private health information disseminated to the public AND their employers. The Department of Health and Human Services (OCR) sanctions FINES for revealing identifiable medical information. It's a national organization that adheres to national laws. Any person who knowingly obtains or discloses individually identifiable medical information in violation of the Privacy Rule may further face criminal penalty of $50,000 and up to a year in prison. (Those are the minimal consequences.)

I first learned about HIPAA when I was working as a union steward for CWA while working at AT&T. At the time, I was very interested in taking my corporate career into Human Resources and immersed myself in the inner-workings of these corporations and their laws, bylaws, guidelines, compliance, etc. An employees medical history was treated with a great deal of respect and many managers refused offers of disclosure from employees themselves for fear that just KNOWING identifiable information could find them in violation.
How the hell did we go from that example to one in which employers have a right to know an employees medical history? Based on my knowledge of HIPAA and why it exists, I have to conclude that Debbie Lesko is an idiot.

Second, we all know that the pharmaceutical industry is a money-making GIANT for our country and our government. I can't watch TV for more than 15-20 minutes before I see an ad for a pill to combat depression, obesity, allergies, impotence, AND... you guessed it... birth control. No one in their right mind could believe that the pharmaceutical industry is going to allow limited access to its all-powerful drugs. Current legislation has been moving towards the legalization of so many substances, it makes my head spin. Money speaks in this country and I'll bet there are more than a few pharmacological lobbyists shaking their heads in bewilderment as they think to themselves, "Debbie Lesko is an idiot."

Third, I'm sure Debbie Lesko has never been scared that she might lose her job because she's pregnant, but it's a real fear. I've been there. Thankfully, we have laws that make it very difficult for an employer to fire someone for being pregnant... but that doesn't mean it doesn't happen. It does. And it sucks. It would be even worse to be fired for preventing pregnancy. Damned if you do, damned if you don't. I can't help but see the similarity in attitude to those opposing the suffragettes 100 years ago. It's a HUGE step backwards in evolution. Proving again, that Debbie Lesko is an idiot.

And last... my 16-year-old daughter has been on birth control for months even though she isn't sexually active. As a parent, I've never questioned my decision to educate and support my children when it came to permanent decisions regarding their bodies. I knew before my daughter was even born that I would educate her as much as possible about sex, her body, and her rights as an independent and liberated woman. It never occurred to me that those rights would be stripped away or require justification to anyone - let alone potential employers. WTF!?

I wonder then... if legislators are successful in limiting birth control for women or making it more expensive or difficult to obtain... what then would be the recourse for a woman to prevent pregnancy or regulate hormones? I could see this leading to a national outbreak of celibacy.
I'm sure every man out there who has been in any kind of long-term relationship understands what happens when his lady is peeved. He ain't gettin' any.

Considering the amount of dudes in charge of passing these bills, I don't think it would take very long for their wives to convince them that Debbie Lesko is an idiot.

Just shaking my head... and pricing real estate on the east coast...

DVR killed the Idol...

Being a theatre geek, my schedule is not like most. I don't do evening family dinners around the dining room table every night. I remember so clearly watching 'The Cosby Show' with my family every Thursday night growing up... but my own family unit doesn't have those traditions. I'm typically running to rehearsal prior to dinnertime (sometimes just after lunch) and while the rest of the world enjoys their weekend, I'm experiencing my busiest days of the week (Saturday and Sunday). Monday is my weekend... my day off... my holy day... I yearn for Sunday night the same way most yearn for Friday... and in my world, having a 'bad case of the Mondays' would not be entirely negative.

You can imagine how much my world changed with the invent of the DVR. Shortly after, you could actually record something at home by pushing a few buttons on your phone (thousands of miles away!)... and then came Netflix and Hulu... pretty much ensuring that I'd never miss another show for the rest of my life.

In scaling back on my expenses, I looked at how much I was paying for cable (and how unnecessary it is with services like Netflix and Hulu) and made a terrifying discovery.
I've been paying $100.00 a month for two shows.

Seriously.

First: 'Game of Thrones' on HBO. It's a miniseries based on a book series by George R R Martin that I read while working for telerelay services for the deaf and hard-of-hearing. I'm not big on fantasy/sci-fi novels, but these were on the community bookshelf at work and I soon found myself addicted and purchasing the rest of the series. I loved HBO's 'Rome' and couldn't wait for 'Game of Thrones'. There's confession #1. My inner geek is showing.

Second: American Idol. I'm actually a little ashamed to admit this one because I think of American Idol as a big corporate sponsor monster, corrupted by greed. I think they exploit their artists, rape them, reshape them for commercial gain, exploit them some more, overwork and underpay them, contract them within inches of their life and snuff out any genuine passion and artistry that once existed before they toss them back out at contract end to make room for the next cookie-cutter 'Idol'. So, I don't often admit to watching Idol (except to a few select friends who occasionally call to have 'what did you think' discussions post-show.)

I don't really give a hoot about any of the judges or their critique. It's art, therefore it's all subjective. (To me, anyhow.) So, I typically fast-forward through commercials as well as their trite, boring commentary.

And here's the big confession: I'm a sap. Seriously. I watch AI alone most of the time and especially towards the beginning - when we learn about back stories and families and who these kids are as artists - I'm moved to tears at least a half-dozen times per episode/audition/sing-off. It's ridiculous, really... but I'm a sucker for good voices and passionate artists. Some of my favorite films are about music - The Red Violin, The Piano, Once... and even the ridiculously cheesy ones - Mr. Holland's Opus, August Rush... will have me bawling like a baby. Full-on ugly cry, right there on my couch. No shame.

I'm the same way with American Idol. I don't know why. Sometimes it's the song that moves me. Sometimes it's the artist. But for whatever reason, I'm a cry-fest... and I love it. I love being moved. I have the same response to the show 'So You Think You Can Dance'. Moved by the harmony of music and movement... I laugh, I cry, I watch as religiously as my schedule and DVR allow.

Rehearsal schedules being what they are, and considering the amount of time I'll spend 'on the road' this year, I don't anticipate being able to keep up on my shows as I'd like to... and in the interest of saving a few ducats before relocating, I'm cutting off my cable completely this week.

*cue separation anxiety*

I keep telling myself that between the internet, Hulu, Netflix and whatever else is out there that I don't know about yet; I'll be able to keep up on my guilty pleasures.

Besides, there are much higher priorities right now than a silly HBO series and a fixed/commercialized singing competition.
Right?
Right.